Lie Detector
by REDROBIN707
Summary: Tim is weird, the team knows that. The team want to see how much of a creep Tim is. Dick happens to own a lie detector, don't ask why. Rated T for creepy Tim and annoyed Tim. Enjoy, I might do more, if requested, no longer a one-shot!
1. Tim

**Lie Detector: Tim**

Tim picked up his mug of coffee and sipped it cautiously, making sure it wasn't to hot, unfortunately it was. Tim put the mug strait back down and ran to the kitchen, pouring a glass of water. Drinking all the water in one go. When Tim was walking back to his chair, a bag was thrown over his head.

"What the fuck!" Tim shouted out, as he was pushed to the flour. Suddenly, he felt very wary and he very quickly lost conciousness.

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When Tim awoke, he was faced with the entire team staring at him. He very quickly realised what was going on, when he saw the machine next to him and the smirk on Dick's face. He also realised, he was tied to the chair.

"Ready for a lie detector test little bro?" Dick chirped happily.

"Why do I have to take a lie detector?" Tim said, dreading the questions the team would have for him.

"Cause we all used to do it, when the team started," Artemis butted in.

"So everyone else is gonna do one?" Tim asked.

"No, just you," Barbara said, with a smile.

"That's unfair," Tim moaned, "Why me?"

"Cause we all wanna know if you really are innocent," Cassie shouted.

"Why are you apart of this?"

"Cause I'm you're girlfriend and I should know," she replied with a smile.

"Enough chatter, lets begin," Dick said, raising a voice, "Question one, Is you're name Timothy Jackson Drake-Wayne?"

"Yes, obviously, who asked that?"

"Garth," Dick replied, Tim shot Garth a look, why are you an idiot.

"He isn't an idiot," Megan shouted at Tim, "I can read you're mind."

"You think I'm an idiot?" Garth asked, sounding legitimately sad.

"Sometimes," Tim replied.

"That's a lie," Dick said, looking at the machine, "Good luck with you're chat with Megan after this Tim. Question two, What do you think of Cassie's body?"

Tim choked slightly at the question and looked at Cassie, with shock.

"I didn't ask that question," Cassie said.

Before Tim could ask, Dick said, "Barbara did."

The team all stared at Barbara before she answered, "She's my best friend, I wanna know what Tim thinks of her body and if I need to kill him, so Tim, what do you think of Cassie's body?"

The attention was back on Tim, "Well, um... It's very nice and curvy, which I like. Her eyes sparkle and her smile lights up the room, which makes me a lot happier." Tim and Cassie both blushed at Tim's statement, while the team mockingly said awe.

"How sweet of you Tim, anyway next question," Dick said looking at the sheet of paper, "Question three, have you ever had a wet dream?"

"This is bullshit man," Tim moaned, shaking his head, "I bet I know who asked that question."

"Really, who would that be Tim," Dick said, sounding as fake as fake could sound.

"Right you asked it," Dick nodded, "You also know the answer."

"We don't," Bart said, Tim shook his head at that.

"I hate you Dick, so much."

"That's a lie, but I can tell everyone the answer to the question was yes."

"Awe, Tim's developing," Barbara said sarcastically.

"I'm fifteen, of course I am."

"Question four, this one is from Bart," Dick said, Tim's eyes were focused on Bart, "If we were in Las Vegas and I got drunk, would you help me back to the hotel?"

"What type of question is that?" Tim stated, confused at Bart's question, "Yes I would, only cause you're mouth would get us in trouble."

"Good to know," Bart said, nodding in the process.

"That's a truth, question five, from Artemis, boxers or briefs."

"Finally, a normalish question," Tim said, thankful at Artemis for a normal question, "Boxers, they are just nicer."

"That's a truth, question six, Do you have a crush on Barbara? That's from me."

Tim shook his head and sighed, "No I don't."

"That's a lie," Dick said putting a hand on Tim's left shoulder, "Sorry Timbo, but she is taken."

Tim expected Cassie to be pissed, but she was giggling, as was most of the team, Barbara just smiled and shook her head, "I'm flattered Tim, I really am."

"Question seven Timmy, from Conner, what is you're nickname for Cassie?"

"I don't want to answer that, I really don't."

"He calls me Wonder Babe," Cassie happily chirped.

"That's lame Teen Wonder," Barbara said.

"So lame," Artemis also said.

"Got to agree with them Timmy," Dick said, trying to sound sympathetic.

"Dick handcuffs Barbara during sex and enjoys acrobatic sex," Tim blurted out.

"How do you know that?" Dick asked is disbelief, as Barbara turned pale.

"You remember when it was Barbara's birthday and you took me along as a third wheel on you're date?"

"Yes I do," Dick answered, "Barbara went missing for about two hours and was drunk when you found her."

"Wellllllll, maybe instead of it being two hours, it was more like one when I found her and she told me some interesting things about you and you're relationship, it was an experience I shall never forget."

"Barbara!" Dick shouted, trying to sound angry, he couldn't really.

"Sorry, I was drunk, can we just get on with Tim's lie detector and talk about this later."

"Sure whatever, next question Tim," Dick paused for a few seconds, "Wow! Jamie, that is amazing."

"I try my best," Jamie replied, with a smirk directed at Tim.

"Go on Dick, what is the question," Tim asked, nervously.

"Catwomen, or Harley Quinn?" Dick said, laughing slightly.

"Oh, for fucksake," Tim moaned loudly, "Cassie, how much trouble am I in, if I say Harley."

"Well we look kinda similar, so you aren't in any trouble, if you say Harley."

"Harley then," Tim said, surprisingly confident.

"That's true, Tim really, Harley over Catwomen? I always thought you had a thing for curvy blondes."

"I don't, it just happens to be, I have a girlfriend, who is blonde and curvy and I prefer Harley over Selina, who also happens to be blonde and curvy. How many more questions are there?" Tim said, wanting this nightmare to be over.

"Only two more Tim, question nine, have you and Cassie got to third base yet? From me of course," Dick said smiling.

"Does Tim have to answer that?" Cassie butted in.

"Yes, but I now think we know the answer already, but Tim, have you?" Dick said, smiling even more now (Is that possible?).

Tim just nodded and then shook his head.

"Final question little bro, from Garth the idiot," Dick said sarcastically, causing Megan to look angry at Tim again, "Why do you pretend to be innocent?"

"Just a preference, I don't want to draw attention to myself," Tim answered.

"That's the truth, you can go now, little bro," Dick said, removing the ropes from Tim's arms.

"I will get my revenge," Tim muttered under his breath.

"Where do you think, you are going Tim," Megan said, anger in her eyes, "We are going to chat about Garth and his intelligence, you have ten seconds to run."

Tim didn't need a second warning, he was off, away from Megan and to plan revenge.


	2. Dick

**Lie Detector: Dick**

Dick felt very groggy, he had been attacked from behind and sprayed with some type of knock out gas.

"Wake up Dickie bird." A familiar voice said.

"Tim? Where am I?" Dick moaned, "Oh pleases don't tell me? I am I about to take a lie detector test?"

"Damn right you are," Conner shouted out. Dick realised that he was in the same place as he was yesterday, when he made Tim take a lie detector.

"Damn it Timmy, why are you so evil?" Dick asked.

"Just the way I was born," Tim said happily, "First question from me, who did you lose you're virginity too?"

"Who did you lose it to?" Dick shot back, "Then I answer."

Tim pulled out Dick's eriscma sticks and turned them on, "Answer, or you get a shock."

"How did you get those?" Dick shouted, "I hide them in a secret place."

"Under you're bed isn't very secret," Barbara shouted.

"Barbara, why do you tell him everything?"

"We gossip, I enjoy it," Barbara answered back.

"Who did you lose you're virginity to?" Tim asked again.

"Zatanna," Dick mumbled under his breath.

"What was that?" Tim said, in a sarcastic tone.

"Zatanna," Dick shouted this time.

"You told me, I was you're first time," Barbara hissed.

"Did I?" Dick said sheepishly, "Tim, next question please? Now!"

"Question two from Conner, why when you were Robin, did you install cameras in the girls shower room?"

"You did what!" Artemis screamed.

"It was a dare from Wally, I just happened to leave them in," Dick reasoned, "Not sure if I ever took them out."

"No you did not," Tim said smirking and day dreaming.

"How do you know that?" Cassie asked.

Tim snapped out of his trance and quickly answered, "It wasn't my fault, I was checking if all the cameras were working and I just happened to find four inactive cameras, which I booted up and then I saw stuff."

"What stuff?" Barbara asked.

"TherewasonlytwogirlsinthereitsnotlikeI'mapervert," Tim said quickly, "I didn't mean to see Barbara and Cassie naked!"

"I'm gonna kill you!" Barbara hissed.

"Not cool boyfriend," Cassie said shaking her head, "Now I get to reveal some of you're secrets."

"That's not fair, I did a lie detector yesterday and I didn't mean to."

"Okay, I wont tell them."

"Is this secret the one about him enjoying being tied up during sex?" Dick chirped with glee. That earned him an electric shock. "Aww, why you little..."

"Little what?" Tim asked.

"You little heel."

"That's cool, question three from Barbara, why did you have a night light until you were fourteen... you had a night light until you were fourteen?" Tim didn't understand Dick.

"It made me feel safe," Dick said, not sounding really bothered.

"Okay, question four from Cassie, what type of relationship do you and Tim have?"

"I've known him since I was eight and he was four, he was there when my parents died," Dick said sombrely, "He gave me a picture his dad took and I would look after him, I like to think of us as Brothers."

"That's nice and sweet," Megan said.

"Very sweet and caring," Beast Boy said.

"Yes, doesn't mean I'm gonna stop the lie detector though," Tim added with a smirk.

"Damn it Tim!" Dick shouted out.

"Okay, I will only ask you four more question okay, next question from Bart, If we were in Las Vegas and I got drunk, would you help me back to the hotel... Bart why do you keep asking that?"

"Spoilers man, spoilers," Bart said, "Would you Dick?"

"Yes, cause you would properly give some poor souls credit card details away."

"Cool thanks," Bart answered back.

"Question six from yours truly, why is Huntress in you're contacts list?"

"I'm not answering thaaaaaaattttttttttttt!" Dick screamed as Tim electrocuted him again. Dick caught his breath again and answered, "We used to be friends and I must of forgot to get rid of her in my contacts."

"Rightttttttt, she used to be a friend, thats cool," Tim said, with his rare smile, "Question seven from Megan, why have you changed the blue of the bird, into pink?"

"I haven't done that... TIM!" Dick screeched, "You little bastard!"

"Okay, final question from me again, whose gonna be the best man, when you get married?"

"I was gonna ask you, but now IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII," Dick received another shock from Tim.

"You were gonna ask Tim? What about me?" Conner asked.

"And me?" Kaldur'ahm asked.

"Guys, I was joking Tim wasn't gonna... where's Tim gone?"

Tim was away, with a note to Dick. 'Have fun explaining things bro!'


	3. Wally

**Lie Detector: Wally**

"It was only a dare!" Wally whined, "Is was just harmless fun!"

"Harmless? Not only did you get me in trouble, but Tim as well," Dick said, shaking his head, as he put Wally into the restraints.

"Tim in trouble? Artemis said she saw Cassie sneak out of Tim's room this morning, I doubt he was in much trouble," Wally reasoned, "Unless Cassie refused to tie him up!"

"She doesn't always tie me up!" Tim cried out.

"Only when he's on his best behaviour," Cassie chirped happily.

"Awe, does Timmy have to earn the right to get his sexual kicks!" Barbara teased.

"Is this national take the piss out of Tim week?" Tim groaned, "Can't we get on with torturing Wally?"

"Right, yes okay! Let's get on with it," Dick said, "Question one from all the girls, Did you tell Dick to put the camera in the shower, so you could watch Artemis?"

"I only did as a dare, I didn't expect Dick to do it, even if he did, I thought he put a normal camera in there, not a security one," Wally reasoned, "It's not that bad though, it properly doesn't even store the data."

"It does," Tim blurted out, without thinking of the consequences.

"How do you know that Rob?" Garth said, with the worse possible intentions.

"Yes, how do you know that Timmy?" Barbara snarled.

"That's it!," Cassie shouted, "No rope bondage for a month!"

"That's unfair!... I mean why should I care!" Tim shouted.

"Rope bondage? I thought it just tying up Tim, what else do you do," Barbara asked.

"Shut up!"

"Do you tie it round his-" Dick began.

"Shut up!"

"I do tie it round his-" Cassie started.

"SHUT UP!"

"Next question, from Bart... does this have anything to do hotels and Las Vegas?"

"Maybe..." Bart said sheepishly.

"Yes, sure whatever," Wally rushed.

"That's true,question three from Conner, why did you drill a whole in the wall connecting the showers?"

"WALLY!" Artemis screamed.

"I was young, I was brash!" Wally said casually.

"But you still looked through it, after you and Artemis got together," Conner added.

"Umm... Dick told me to take pictures," Wally said.

"That's a lie."

"WALLY!" Artemis shouted again.

"Now we know, Tim and Wally are both perverts, next question from me, Why when drunk, do you referrer to me as sweetie?"

"I don't do that!"

"You bloody do!" Dick stated.

"I don't remember calling you sweetie!"

"That's a truth, you get of the hook," Dick said, faking sounding bitter, "Question five from Tim-"

"Its not a question about perving techniques is it," Wally said, smiling for the first time during the test.

"I'm done," Tim stated, as he left the room with Cassie, who had a devilish grin on her face.

"Tim is in danger," Barbara said.

"How so?" Kaldur'ahm asked.

"I just told Cassie, where he keeps his handcuffs."

"Tim's so dead," Dick chuckled, "Anyway the question is, why do you own a Barbie doll?"

"How does he know that?" Wally spat, taking a few moments to realise what he had just admitted to. This got laughs from the team, especially Dick.

"You own a Barbie doll?" Bart giggled.

"Yeah, when I moved in with Barry, it was something left behind by a previous owner of the house and it was all I had for a while and was my only friend until I met Dick."

"I feel like a total dick for laughing now," Dick said sombrely, "Question six from Barbara, Can you help me explain to Dick, that he has a weird fetish for redheads?... I don't!"

"I don't need a lie detector to tell you, that is a lie," Wally chirped.

"Question seven from Jaime, can you tell you're cousin to stop stealing all my food?"

"Bart, stop stealing Jamie's food!" Wally ordered.

"Fine," Bart sighed loudly.

"He won't stop, you know," Tim said, as he returned, without Cassie.

"No Cassie Tim? Did you tie her up, in some weird fantasy," Dick teased.

"I didn't tie her up, she is just tired," Tim said defensively.

"Yeah right," Dick said, "Question eight from Megan, why do you always have cuts on you're ears?"

Artemis turned pale. Wally answered, "Well, in bed Artemis places an apple on my head and tries to shoot it, I don't know why, she sometimes misses and apparently the fast regeneration isn't great with ears, who knew?"

"Bit weird Artemis, but its a bit like Tim I suppose," Dick said, causing Tim to sigh, "Last question from me, a simple and normal one, paper or plastic?"

"A normal one, that's good, plastic because its simpler to carry around," Wally said with a grin, "Can you let me go now?"

"Hold on!" Tim said with a smirk, "Wally, you do know you could of just vibrated out of the leather restraints?"

Wally didn't answer, he just blinked and felt stupid.


End file.
